Friendship Questionnaire:
Do you clean your house daily?
Do you leave your kids toys everywhere?
Do you buy your kids clothing second hand?
Do you buy your kids clothing new?
Do you serve only organic food at dinner?
Do you buy drive thru dinners?
Do you breastfeed?
Do you bottle-feed?
Do your kids eat school lunch?
Do you pack your kids lunch daily?
Wait, don't answer any of them..Why?? Because I don't care. And it is none of my business.
Lately I have seen a lot of blog posts from people about how mothers shouldn't feel bad for not doing everything under the sun with their child. At first glance I, like many, was happy to see them and was encouraged with the thought "yeah, why should I feel bad for not doing crafts every single friday, or not having a special note in their lunchbox every single day along side a warm fresh baked cookie". With all the "pressure" out there to do all these things I totally see and understand (sometimes even feel) that discouragement, thinking my kid is missing out on something.
But then I had another thought and it has me thinking...Why are we putting those mothers down? Why are we saying it's ok to not do those things but in turn making those who do them feel bad?
***(I know some of them are saying "hey don't feel like you have to do all this for me, I don't care". But remember...some people like doing those things, and also....Personally speaking...I'm not cleaning my house for you, trust me, it's for my sanity!)***
Honestly I am somewhat offended by some of the posts I have read and feel like I need to call them out on something. Maybe I enjoy keeping a clean house (I'm what you would call OCD), maybe I like doing holiday crafts with my kid. I will let you in on a little secret of mine...one of my biggest pet peeves in my house is my microwave being clean. I hate a dirty microwave, I must clean that thing every day, but that is how I like MY microwave. Why should I feel bad for doing those things just because other moms don't do them. Guess what, I'm not over here sitting in my "clean microwave" house talking bad about how "so and so" doesn't clean as often as I do. I'm not sure if it's a way to make ourselves feel better or what, but I don't understand how putting down one group of people makes you feel better. Because honestly that is what these posts are, It's putting down mothers who do those things in an effort to make others feel better about what they choose to do or not do. How is that right?
Instead of targeting a certain "group" of moms, here is my challenge to all moms...
BE THE WOMAN, WIFE, AND MOTHER GOD CALLED YOU TO BE!!!
If God didn't give you the drive to do crafts every friday...Don't do them!!! And if he did then have at and get to crafting! We should never discourage another mom from doing those things, just as we shouldn't make mothers feel discouraged for not doing them. There is so much pressure from the media and world to live a specific lifestyle and be a specific way. The last thing mothers need is discouragement regarding what they do or don't do. Guess what, It doesn't bother me if you let your kids toys stay on the living room floor, I don't care if you have never done a single craft, and I am not going to walk in your house and go straight for the microwave to see how clean it is. There is only one thing I care about when it comes to you and your kids...that you love them with a Christ like love. That's it!! If you are loving your child/children then you are a great mom! I know right, how can it be that simple? you mean I don't have to bake fresh homemade cookies every weekend and make pancakes and bacon every saturday morning while everyone else sleeps in? Nope! You sure don't. (but if that is you than by all means, bake your heart out!) Just love your babies and show them God's love.
There is a Steven Curtis Chapman song called "Do Everything" and it talks about whatever you do, do it for God's glory. How many times do we find ourselves wondering what someone else will think of us based on how clean our house is or what we do/ give our kids?? Now, how many times do we ask ourselves what God thinks about those things?? Seriously, weight it out and see if the numbers are in God's favor...because they should be!! You were not created to measure up to Sally down the street's life or opinion, you were created to honor God. Every aspect of your life should reflect that.
So let's all make a resolution to stop pinpointing things that others do or don't do and focus on loving our kids, showing love to others, and living for God's glory in our life. I hope that maybe someone is encouraged to start asking themselves what God thinks and not what others think, or maybe it was a good reminder of that (I know I have to remind myself daily of that).
Closing thought:
Galatians 1:10-- For do I now Persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? For if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of God.
UNTIL NEXT TIME...
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